My World

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

My world is falling apart.

The dream doesn’t hold together anymore. 

I’m losing interest in the illusion,

in the gravitational pull of thought.

-Nanne Nyander "Out of the Labyrinth"

Stars in the Sky

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

Stars in the sky,

reflecting on the ground I walk on,

if I stretch out my hand I can touch them, 

I’m home. 

The journey to nowhere has been so long. 

Still, no time has passed.

Now is all there is, 

and now is now, and now, 

and NOW. 

-Nanne Nyander "The Way Back Home"

Stay Here

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

Emptiness, silence,

I am.

I’m out of reach of the movement of the mind.

O this trickery mind.

I salvage the silence within me 

before it gets gulped up by the noisy mind, 

the destroying force within me.

The force that does everything in its power

to distract me from what I am,

from my true identity.

I just need to stay here,

I just need to be.

I don’t want to go to war with my thoughts. 

They are slippery, and demanding of my attention,

like an enemy within.

An enemy that I hardly notice until it’s too late. 

Sleep no more,

it’s time to be vigilant.

It’s time to wake up.

-Nanne Nyander "The Struggle of Going Nowhere"

You’re Already Here

© Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

One step forward, two steps back. 

Two steps forward, one step back. 

Why are you moving at all? 

You’re already here. 

-Nanne Nyander  "The Way Back Home"

Too Tired

© Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

I’m dying, I’m sinking,

you’re singing, I’m crying.

Will this ever be over?

I’m dying inside.

Is this how it’s supposed to be?

I’m empty, I’m drowning.

I know it’s just a story in my head. 

Still, my inside is like a volcano,

but hard as a rock of ice.

Nothing seems to be able to melt it.

My inside is my outside,

and it’s empty and full at the same time.

I can’t think, but still, there are thoughts. 

I’m too tired to move, too tired to not move. 

I cannot do anything,

I cannot not do anything.

I’m dying, I’m falling.

I can’t move forward, and I can’t go back. 

Will this ever be over?

-Nanne Nyander "One Without a Second"

Labyrinth

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

The illusion is like a labyrinth, 

and I’ve found my way out.

I never was in it,

I have always been here.

The labyrinth was only in my head. 

- Nanne Nyander "The Way Back Home"

Nothing Makes Sense

© Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

I’m here again, looking out.
I’m here again, looking in.
I thought I lost myself over there,
but I’m here.
I let go of everything,
but everything is still here.
I’m losing myself over and over again.
Does thought glue everything together?
Is thought trying to make sense of the nonsensical, 
trying desperately to keep the illusion going?
I can see it.
Still, the illusion is here.
Everything’s held together by thought,
and everything is kept apart by thought. 
Nothing makes sense without thought. 
Everything makes sense without thought. 
Nothing actually makes sense.

-Nanne Nyander "One Without a Second"

Stop Doing

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

Too tired to be me, 

but I find no way out. 

I want to rest,

but I don’t know how.

It all seems so silly,

how can I not know how to rest?

It’s just to stop doing.

But how do I do that?

-Nanne Nyander "One Without a Second"

To Be a Me

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

Do you think I’m strange?

Do you think I’m odd?

Is there a rule, how to be, 

how to think, 

how to feel? 

Feel me, am I too soft?

I’ve followed the rules, how to be,

how to be to be ok.

But sometimes I forget,

sometimes I don’t understand the unspoken rules. 

There’s always a nagging feeling in

the back of my head, 

in my body,

that I did something wrong.

How to be, how to be me?

There can’t be a rule, how to be me.

I am, and I am no rule.

I am me, I am.

-Nanne Nyander "One Without a Second"

So Much Bigger

 © Nanne Nyander - Poems and Paintings

Of course I couldn’t find myself.

I’m so much bigger than I ever could have imagined. 

I was looking for something small.

-Nanne Nyander "One Without a Second"