The autumn leaves,
leave me breathless.
I’m falling,
uncontrollable,
there’s no bottom,
there is just empty space.
Moving,
moving through space with no mind,
I don’t mind.
The autumn leaves are falling.
Catch me.
There’s just emptiness,
no words, no thoughts,
no reality in the mind of the doer.
Stay, empty, space, let me fall,
keep falling, empty, silence.
Exhale, exhaustion,
no more holding on,
emptiness, stay.
No thoughts can catch me here.
I’m empty, empty, empty.
I’m the autumn leaves
lost in space waiting to be found.
Not waiting anymore.
I’m not a leaf,
I’m the space in which it is all happening,
without anything happening.
I am, I am.
-from " The Struggle of Going Nowhere"
I can hear a distant whisper,
a whisper beyond time.
It whispers not to the mind,
but to itself.
I listen and think I know what it’s saying,
but I’m just in the way.
Listen, be silent, don’t think.
It speaks not to the mind,
but to the silence itself.
The silence that I am.
-Nanne Nyander
***
Mind is fine with being bored,
desperate, confused, fed up.
It likes being the one who is sad and depressed.
This is not what I want,
but the mind doesn’t mind.
I want to be free and happy.
Mind doesn’t mind either way.
Mind is holding me in a tight grip,
wanting me to stay.
Silence will take me there.
There is nothing but silence,
noise can’t interrupt the silence,
and neither can thoughts.
No matter how loud my mind is,
there is still silence.
-Nanne Nyander "The Way Back Home"
All I can think of is you.
When will I be reunited with my true love?
There is no when,
there is no then,
there is only now.
See, feel, don’t think.
No thought can take me there,
no amount of thinking can take me there.
Thought keeps the distance visible
between me and my beloved.
Sailing through the night sky,
looking for you.
Are you still dreaming,
or are you awake, awake to reality,
awake to the truth?
Sail with me, through the sky,
till we reach the end of time.
We are going nowhere,
and it’s a beautiful journey.
- Nanne Nyander
What is me?
There is nothing left to hold me together.
Everything is not me.
What is left, when nothing is me?
But still, something continues looking.
What are you looking for?
Sounds bouncing around in my head and disappear.
New ones come and replace the old ones,
some seem to come back,
again and again.
But back to what?
Rain washes away my tears,
washes away the frustrating feeling of being lost.
-Nanne Nyander
Thoughts are like leaves in the autumn,
don’t get attached to them,
let them do their dance,
let them do their intriguing dance
and move on.
-Nanne Nyander
**
My soulmate is not some distant lover far away.
My soulmate is within me and without me,
being aware of my soul calling out for help,
not understanding why I’m struggling and crying.
“I am right here, and so are you,” she says.
I let my guard down and let her in.
Everything vanishes.
It’s quiet, peaceful, silent.
I’m calm, I’m weightless,
was it all a dream?
Or is this a dream?
-Nanne Nyander
**
I’m the music in my ears,
sound, hear, disappear.
I’m the trees I see,
moving, not moving, swaying in the wind.
I’m the touch of invisible hands when I’m drowning,
grab, stretch, hold.
I’m the scent of jasmine in the summer breeze,
intoxicating, longing, calming.
I’m the taste of honey,
sweet on the tongue, smooth, happy.
I’m the thought of nothing,
embracing, peaceful, alive.
I’m everything,
life, home, peace.
I’m nothing.
- Nanne Nyander
.jpeg "Nanne Nyander . se")
I’m falling apart.
What I once thought was me is falling apart,
it doesn’t hold together anymore.
Random pieces floating around in the universe.
If I don’t pick them up and build a me,
I’m nowhere to be found.
-One Without a Second
**
There is no solid ground,
nowhere to land.
A feeling is just a feeling, without any meaning,
a sound is just a sound, no meaning.
I am nowhere to be found.
An emotion is just an emotion, no suffering,
no story, nowhere to land.
Feelings, sound, smell, sight,
it’s all separate without any connecting threads.
Still, it is all the same.
I’m not even lost,
me does not exist.
If I don’t create an I,
if I don’t create a self out of nothing,
I’m nowhere to be found,
there’s nowhere to land,
nothing to land on,
nothing that can land.
Nothing,
still,
here I am.
-One Without a Second
**
